Throw me the dog bone!

“Look what I bought Abby!” my daughter Katharine exuded enthusiasm while on Skype with me last Saturday. She had just come home from her errands, one of which was Bonnie’s Bakery, an intimate Scottsdale, Arizona bon-bon boutique—for dogs.

I am not a stranger to such news. As she held up the elegantly decorated confection that resembled a gourmet cupcake, I averred that I’d seen such Bowser bites in my favorite pet store here in Missoula, Montana, Go Fetch!

“They always look so good!” I announced, “and they smell so good when I walk in and they are freshly baked.”

We chuckled over the trend, and then Katharine told me the woman who owns the shop she frequents likes to nibble on them herself for a mid-morning healthy snack. Go figure.

“Read me the ingredients,” I ordered, after pointing out that the ones for sale in establishments I’ve seen advertise only the purest peanut butter, sweet potato, and icings made with organic non-fat yogurt. What about that is not to be consumed by humans?

“Gingerbread, cinnamon, nutmeg, flax seed, and whole grain wheat are the only things in this one.” She lifted to the camera a lovely square petit four my mother would have purchased at Jurgensen’s Bakery and served at the Pasadena Junior League Luncheon. The other selection Katharine had made was a small sack of Savory Sweet Potato and Chicken Biscuits. Fit for a king—Shepherd, that is.

Dog food has made the leap from nasty to natural; I myself feed my boys natural and organic Canidae, and even reward good behavior with natural treats as opposed to the “junk food” for which they might more readily do back flips and fetch me a beer from the refrigerator—probably even pop the top. But dessert? Is that really deserved and more importantly, can I leave it these to them and resist such temptation?

“So she really eats it?” I wanted to get back to the woman in the Arizona shop who nabs a nibble now and then from the gingerbread. “I wonder if it tastes like spice cake? With ingredients like that, how could it be bad?”
Remember when your brother double dared you to eat a Dog Bone dog biscuit? We eyed each other on camera, mischief in our musing.

“Do you dare me?” Katharine taunted. And with my nod, came her tentative nibble.

“Yummmmm!” She turned to face Abby, there in the background, tail wagging in anticipation, and took another, larger bite. “Want a bite, Abby, before Mommy eats it all?” Then she turned again to me to note that, “this would be healthier than the power bars I eat for a snack before working out!”

These days it’s sometimes difficult to distinguish man’s health care from that of man’s best friend—and not just when it comes to medical care. At most pet stores they’ve covered the preventative disease bases: There are dog memory puzzles, brain games, and even pet medication websites that compete in the same pricing war and advertising hiatus that human prescriptions do. Who will outlive whom? When I was informed that one of my dogs medical requirements would involve a lifetime of treatments, 3 times a day, entailing eye flush, eye ointments and eye drops, and the vet said, “for the rest of his life,” I couldn’t help but add, “or mine—whichever ends first.”

Still, I perform the daily ritual as I toss Glucosamine/Chondroitin Sulfate and Flax Oil capsules into his organic kibble. Remember opening those cans that reeked to high heaven? Well, the dog to whom I served those along with whatever scrap of fat was left on my father’s plate lived to be 17 years old—and on Dog Bone Biscuits.
In lieu of the bone in your Christmas roast, the latest, healthy chew that is superior salve for gums and teeth is the elk antler. During a visit Katharine’s mother-in-law nabbed one for her Lab back at home but was told she could not carry it onto the airplane as it would be considered “a weapon.” Arguably, preventative health measures are.

I begged Katharine to sample the sweet potato biscuits, that root vegetable being a healthy alternative to the white russet, and one that we actually both prefer. When she readily took a bite, turns out she couldn’t masticate. Guess that one’s intended for canine canines only.

“Chris is going to leave me,” she chuckled at the thought of her husband’s reaction to her confession.

“Or want one of those gingerbread cakes for himself,” I proposed, right before I headed to the car to check out what Go Fetch! was offering at today’s bakery counter.

When I walked in the door, the scent of cheese and garlic was intoxicating. Wheat-free cheese heart crackers touted rice flour, garlic, parsley, cream cheese, cheddar, and eggs. Dipped Puppy Paws were made of carob and then dipped in white chocolate, Garlic Bagels were literally just that, and for the sweet tooth? Pure and simply ginger cookies.

My mouth watered as I texted Katharine with news of my local health food finds. She wrote back—jealous. But they were going out to dinner that night I reminded her—how about stopping off at Bonnie’s for dessert?